“Well aren’t you just a fun little lollipop triple dipped in psycho…”ĥ5. “Q: Why did the math book look so sad? A: Because it had so many problems.”ĥ4. Me: Maybe if you listened to me when I told you not to do that, you would be perfectly fine right now.”ĥ2. “Other moms: OMG honey are you okay? Come let’s clean that up. “I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended please be patient I will get to you shortly” Funny Sarcastic Quotes on Life to Motivate & Laugh Out Loudĥ1. “When someone asks where do you see yourself in 10 years… Buddy, I’m just trying to make it to Friday.”ĥ0. “He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.”Ĥ9. “Remember when I asked for your opinion? Yeah me neither.”Ĥ8. It’s about loving what you have and being grateful for it.”Ĥ7. “Happiness isn’t about getting what you want all the time. “My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point to where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.”Ĥ6. Which I generally realize right after I have said them.”Ĥ5. “Girls be like “I’m a doll” yeah, so was chucky you crazy bitch…”Ĥ4. I plan to tell them, that we had to drag our butts across the grass. “In the future, my grandchildren may ask about the global crisis of 2020 and how the world was tragically out of tp. And that one? He’ll be sneaking in the good tequila and twinkies.” Best Most funniest Sarcasm quotes | Quotes and HumorĤ1. “Do you ever look at all your kids and think… That one will be dropping me curbside at the nursing home. “I will slap you so hard even Google won’t be able to find you.”ģ9. “I’m not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.”ģ8. “Sometimes I look at people and think “Really.? That’s the sperm that won?””ģ7. “If someone asks “Are you crazy?” simply reply “Yes.” Boom. It’s like punching people in the face, but with words”ģ5. When you focus on possibilities, you’ll have more opportunities.”ģ4. “When you focus on problems, you’ll have more problems. “If you see someone crying, ask if it’s because of their haircut.”ģ3.
Other times, I try to get out of the car with my seat belt on.”ģ2. “Sometimes, I shock myself with the smart stuff I say and do. “You are living proof that god has a sense of humor.” Best Sarcastic Memes images | Sarcastic, Funny quotesģ1. Oh who am I kidding, follow me, I know a shortcut”ģ0. If a child’s been holding it together all day, in an unpleasant situation, the second they see you, they know it’s time they can finally let go.”Ģ9. If you can’t make something better… well, then who else can? You, dear mama, are a garbage disposal of unpleasant feelings and emotions.
You are the place they can come to with all of their problems. “This is why children are 800% worse when their mothers are around because you, mama, are their safe place. If you really piss me off, naturally there will be a disaster.”Ģ8.
“I like to think of myself as a natural disaster. I said: “No, we all seem to enjoy it.””Ģ7. “My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffers from mental illness. When I was a kid, I put glue on my hands just so I could peel it off when it dried.”Ģ6. “Therapist: “What do we say when we feel angry?” Me *putting hair in a ponytail * “This mother f-“ therapist: “ummm no”Ģ5.
0 kommentar(er)
